There are lots of things I could have chosen to write about today. The fact that I went to a Football match, in January no less, especially given I’m more a Polo in June sorta gal. I could talk about the fragility of friendships, the trouble with twitter, or the fact my stupid phone is a piece of sh......................! However whilst all of those are topics are things I may return to, today I want to talk about just having a nice sit down.
A nice sit down with a cup of tea, a proper “ahhhh” moment, clichéd, definitely, but I do tend to find that clichés are clichés for a reason. There is something to be said for a sit down, a proper sit down, a moment of pause, a minute in which to do nothing. Now admittedly I’m the type of person who rarely sits down, and when I do I’m usually doing at least three other things at the same time. I never used to be this way, but apparently with me you don’t get middle ground, only extremes. Having seen both extremes has allowed me to see that it is not just the folks like the ‘new’ me that have the problem. People who you look at and think “well they don’t do a lot, they must have oddles of me time” are probably just as bad as everyone else.
I used to be rather a big lass, and not in a good way. I was generally quite stationary and I rarely did what I was supposed to be doing. Never-the-less, much as the evidence seemed to point to the contrary, I never stopped, I never took time for me. I would regularly “reward” myself, perk myself up from all the non-me stuff in my life, generally with a kitkat, a packet of crips, a cigarette, and on a couple of occasions a 500g block of cheese, neat. I thought of these ‘treats’ as me moments, but they were exactly the opposite, they were moments where I could hid from the things I didn’t want to face, short lived moments that needed regularly repeating to keep me going, and of course by regularly repeating them I also put on about 50 extra pounds.
I believe that having a proper sit down is a real treat that we owe ourselves at some point every day. It is all too easy to think you have taken a moment for yourself, a moment to just enjoy the moment, when in fact all you’ve done is given yourselves a brief reward that won’t sustain you nearly as much as you think. I’m talking a proper sit down, none of this perching on the edge of the sofa for a moment whilst catching a few minutes of the show that happens to be on, whilst all the while know you should be getting on with the washing up/ ironing/ hovering*. How about when you are fully entrenched on the sofa, but with the TV, laptop and phone all on around you and allowing you to engage in several types of media at once, that is not time for yourself. There is so much going on in our lives all the time and it is easy to think you are resting when really you are just engaging in another distraction from yourself.
It’s taken me a long time and someone repeatedly telling me, to realise how important time for me, is. I would go as far as to say it is up there with food, air and shelter. I guess it was only yesterday that it finally struck me how big of a deal I think this is. I got a phone call from a good friend, someone who is going through a bit of a tough time, who needed a chat. The one thing I found myself wanting to impart more than any of the other bits of advice, or things I though might cheer them up, was take time for you.
It’s funny, having a sit down is something some of us really need to work at and then there are those who do it natural. My other half has always stressed how important it is too him to have time for himself. I could never really understand why it was so important to him. I think I am starting to get it.
So now I’ll leave you guys to it, I’m off to make a cuppa, toast a hot cross bun and just have a nice sit down, maybe you should too.
*delete as appropriate
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